The Charisma Myth

The Charisma Myth: How Anyone Can Master the Art and Science of Personal Magnetism by Olivia Fox Cabane
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

“To know others is knowledge; to know oneself is wisdom.” ~Lao Tsu

Steve Jobs, Bill Clinton, Barrack Obama, Whoopi Goldberg, Oprah Winfrey….What do these people have that you and I don’t? Charisma. They seem to have some special power or personality traits that attract people to them effortlessly. They attract all the attentions when they walk into a room, even without speaking. Somehow, we were taught that either we have this trait, or we don’t; so I was immediately drawn to this title once I spot it in a bookstore, and…

Yes, charisma can be learned.

Presence, warmth and power.

According to this wonderful book written by Olivia Cabane, charisma is a matter of presence, warmth and power. Presence is constantly paying attention to what’s going on when you’re interacting with people. If you are 100% involved, they feel valued and respected. One of these important skills is listening skill.

Warmth is expressed through kindness, actions and even body language. Do you think your body language has more power over the words you speak, or vice versa? You’re extremely wrong if you say “words.” Your physical comfort and mental state affect your words and body language, and people pick up messages from our body language and words that you don’t even realize yourself. Through out the author described multiple ways and exercises to get over or control your mental and physical discomfort, which will help increase personal charisma, the image that your body language and words projected.

Power is the most important and influential charisma. You do not have be an actual world leader like Colin Powell to impress people with your authority. The way you carry yourself, your body language and the way you dress and act can increase your impression and influence in others.

Not all charismatic people attract people the same way. There are all different kinds of charisma like the different kinds of personality. They can be achieved with different exercised and mind tricks and can be used on different situations. There's only one "first impression" in each event, and it's important to make it count. There are lots of exercises through out the book to help you learn the skills. Although I think they are a bit time consuming, they are actually useful.

Get the book. The wait is over. It's your turn to shine. .